


To Run or To Stay

by angelleighhoran



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: #i don't know how to tag this..., #running, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-30
Updated: 2017-07-30
Packaged: 2018-12-08 23:34:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11656998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelleighhoran/pseuds/angelleighhoran
Summary: Basically another story of Neil running away -- but instead of Andrew, the Coach or those Neil considered as his friends, it was someone Neil didn't expect, to catch him before he ran too far.





	To Run or To Stay

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, this the first time I posted a fanfiction, but I woke up this morning with this idea...
> 
> I hope this isn't too far from Canon, and that I wrote the characters correctly and that the fanfiction was grammatically correct, etc.
> 
> Thank you, and enjoy!!
> 
> With love,  
> Angel.

To most people, today was like any other day.  But to Neil Josten, today was like “one of those days”.  It was one of those days where his chest closed in a little too much, where demons with familiar faces were brighter, more vivid than any other night, where his feet wanted to carry him to an unknown location on the map, his name heavy on his shoulder to bear another day.  He knew that if he let his feet carry him away to the one place he felt safe, he couldn’t return.

It would be the guilt, that would strangle him and hold him to his new bed of nothing.  But he always saw it coming.  He spent his first year at Palmetto State University, waiting for the day he’ll run away when the reality of things gotten too close.  When his past got too close to him.  When his father, and everything he and his mother tried to run away from, got too close, that they could touch him, that they could hurt him, and anybody around him.

It was still a shock to him that the Foxes, the coach, the nurse, and even the president of PSU, Mr Charles Whittier.  But if he ran – when – he wasn’t so sure they’d accept him back.  Not after nearly two years.

The anniversary of Nathan Wesninski’s death took a toll on Neil.  The death of Nathaniel Wesninski took a toll on Neil.  The anniversary of seeing Nathan, of being Nathaniel, of everything that he was taught to run away from.  He knew his mother was in a pile of burnt dust, screaming her head off at him for not running fast enough.  For staying too long.

So, Neil ran.  He was wearing the black jacket Nicky got him, that was identical to Andrew’s – or maybe he was wearing Andrew’s?  Neil didn’t know, and he wasn’t sure he cared – _Andrew_.  Just the thought of his name caused him to hesitate on his way out of the empty dorm.  His bag was hitched on his shoulder, heavier than the bag had ever been.  He ignored the pang that was beating against his chest and rushed down the stairs and out of the building.

Neil had a hoodie under the jacket, the late night cold against his face.  He was speed walking through the streets that led away from the Fox Tower.  That led away from the collection of streets that PSU and everything connected to the university was on.  Then, a voice confused but still dull and full of annoyance stopped him from breaking out into a run.  All the voice said was “Neil?”

Neil turned to the side and saw a familiar face, with blond hair, hazel eyes, fair light skin.  Neil pushed the hoodie of his sweater down and off his head, and he gave the shorter man a raised brow.  “What do you want, Aaron?” he asked with a bite.

“Where the fuck are you going?” Aaron asked, stepping off the grass and onto the sidewalk.  It made him stand almost right in front of Neil.  Neil took a step back with a matching annoyed look.  “It almost looks like you’re running with everything you got.”

“And so what if I was?” Neil asked, raising a brow.  “I don’t remember you ever caring.”

“I don’t,” Aaron growled.  Neil watched as he suddenly hesitated, looking away to the direction of the Fox Tower.  “Did anybody else see you leave?”

“No,” Neil muttered.  “And I was kind of hoping no one would.”

Aaron tilted his head.  Neil watched as the shorter man stared over his shoulder for a long moment, only irritating Neil further, until he spoke again.  “What about Andrew?  You’re willing to run away from him?” Aaron asked, looking back to him.

Neil’s breath hitched, and he looked down to the ground, then to the jacket that he was wearing.  He looked back up to Aaron and said, “If my mother was here, she’d scream at me to run.  Her screams still echo, like a conscience voice inside my head.  Like, I have given up every promise we made together, that she forced out of me, just so I could play Exy, just so I could be something important just a little longer.  I wanted to run right after our first game against the Ravens – that was the plan.  Then when I stayed, I made a new dead line of when I’ll run.  To make my mother proud or something, I don’t know.  To keep the Foxes from getting hurt by my father’s men, I guess.  I wasn’t supposed to stay.”

Aaron stared at him for a long moment after Neil finished talking, his cheek inhaled like he was biting at it.  Then he narrowed his eyes and said, “You can’t run away from your problems.  It’s fucked up and makes you look like a coward.  Your father is already dead.  Your father’s men can all fuck themselves because they won’t ever be able to touch us, with the FBI in your contacts on your phone – that’s if you didn’t throw it away already.”

Neil was about to bite back with a snarky retort, but Aaron beat him to it, continuing as if his pause wasn’t anything.  “If we wanted to run from our problems, we would.  Everybody in the world wants to run from their problems, but it always catches up on us without any warning.  If you’re out there alone or some shit, nobody would be around to keep you from doing some stupid shit.  If you stay here, I’m sure the Foxes would throw up some stupid defence wall to protect you, like the stupid idiots they are,” Aaron then snorted, almost nonchalantly.  “You run all you want, Neil, but you won’t be running for long.”

Neil, frozen in his spot, stared at Aaron.  The shorter man rolled his eyes and looked away.  It was as if Aaron was giving Neil the opportunity to run like he was pretending he never saw Neil.  Neil bit his lip and flexing his fingers holding the heavy bag’s strap.  Then he chuckled dryly, causing Aaron to turn to him again.  “I think the reason I couldn’t run so far would be because my bag got too heavy in the past two years,” he muttered, then heaved the bag off his shoulder, letting it dig into the side of his leg.  “And you’re right.  I guess I almost forgot how protective the Foxes could get.  And they would kill me if I left.  Kevin would scream my ear off.”

Aaron snorted, “Yeah, and both Nicky and Matt would cry all of our ears off.”

Neil grinned, then stopped short as they two guys stared at each for a second.  “Well, I never saw this day coming anytime soon.  Or anytime at all, really,” Neil said.

“Yeah, don’t expect it to happen again,” Aaron retorted.  “Next time you run and I somehow am the only one to catch you, I’ll just call Nicky or Kevin to chase your ass.  Or just ignore your entire existence.”

Neil snorted, “Yeah, I’m still shocked you even recognized me at all.”

Aaron began to walk in the direction of the Fox Tower, and after Neil gave a hesitant second, he followed, lifting the bag back onto his shoulder.  Aaron glanced at him and unsuccessfully hid his annoyance, “Looks like another year of Neil Josten staying instead of running?”

Neil grinned down to him and said, “Yup, and this time I plan to stay.”

“Fan-fucking-tastic,” Aaron grumbled.

Neil laughed quietly.  They stay quiet as they walked back into the building, and up the stairs.  There wasn’t anybody in the hallway, besides a guy in the Football section going from one dorm to another, and when Aaron and Neil stood outside of the dorm Neil shared with Andrew and Kevin, they turned to each other for a moment, a raised brow on each of their faces.  Then, Neil pushed the door open to see that the room was still empty.  He quickly dropped off the bag and the jacket back into its previous place, then got out and walked with Aaron to the girls’ room.

All of the Foxes, except for the freshmen players, were sitting around.  Andrew was on Renee’s desk, leaning towards the window, while everyone else was sitting around on the couch and the bean bags that were dragged from the other rooms into the girls’ dorm.  Though, when the door opened, and Aaron stepped in before Neil, everyone’s attention was on them.

“Woah,” Nicky tilted his head.  “Did Neil not realize that Aaron is with him, instead of Andrew?”

“More like, did Aaron forget he hated Neil’s guts?” Allison pointed out.

“Or he forgot he himself wasn’t Andrew,” Matt snorted.  “Come on in, we’re just about to start another movie.”

“What took you guys forever?” Dan asked, with her arms wrapped around Matt’s neck.

Neil shrugged when Aaron turned to look back at him, then they both snorted, only causing their teammates more confusion.  “He lost his way,” Aaron said and got into the free bean bag.  “Like the stupid idiot, that he is.”

Neil shrugged again to everyone’s questioning stares.  “Isn’t it called being disoriented after sleeping over your homework?” he bit back.  Aaron rolled his eyes and Neil flipped him off, then Neil walked around to stand beside the desk Andrew was at.  Dan’s sigh was loud before the movie started.  The room was dimmed, besides the bright light of the T.V. and the small fading speck of fire at the edge of Andrew’s cigarette.

Neil sat beside Andrew on the desk when the older man moved over to give more space, and he heard Andrew whisper lowly into his ear, “Did he cause any trouble?”

Neil looked over to Aaron, who suddenly looked away from the T.V. with confusion, then narrowed his eyes on Neil when he saw the younger man looking up at him.  Neil turned back to Andrew, who was still looking at Neil, and he whispered back, “Nah.  Mostly talked about how stupid the Foxes can be.”

“Can’t disagree,” Andrew said.

Neil gave Aaron another glance and saw the blond man shaking his head as he turned his attention back to the movie.  Neil grinned to Andrew and said, “Mainly that I am, obviously.”

“Can’t disagree,” Andrew said, and he had a small upturn of the lips, barely even a hint of a smile.  Neil settled back against the window, their shoulders pressed to each other as they watched over the other Foxes, or watching each other, rather than the movie.

Maybe in the near future, Neil would feel the same symptoms of the need to run away like he did just an hour or so ago, but Aaron, for once in the time Neil knew him, was right.  Not only would he not be able to run far, but the Foxes were exactly what Aaron explained them to be.  Even though some of them can be annoying – Kevin and Aaron, specifically – they all had each other’s back, and if it was another person on the team that decided to run away, and nobody stopped them like Aaron stopped Neil, Neil would’ve broken every path he could to have that person’s back, to protect them just as they would protect him.

And maybe Aaron and Neil had a better understanding of each other like they had some kind of secret or agreement between each other that perked the other Foxes’ attention, that they kept silent.  Or maybe they never really spoke of the incident again, but they talk when they’re in their 30s, Andrew in the kitchen putting together bowls of ice cream for himself, and for Aaron and Katelyn’s daughters.  Hell, maybe in the future, they sit together and talk about their love/hate towards their mothers, with complete awkwardness and annoyance, as they begin to accept each other.

**Author's Note:**

> Again, thank you for reading!
> 
> Follow my Tumblr: angelleighhoran.tumblr.com
> 
> With love,  
> Angel.


End file.
